Money isn't everything, even in America.
One of my roommates, Cassy, was finally home for a solid eighteen hours. It was glorious. We watched three hysterically cheesy classic horror films on TCM, then went to bed, nervous Hugo the Dummy was going to kill us in our sleep. The next morning, I had someone to talk to over breakfast! Amazing! I love this revolutionary invention, this..."conversation," I think they call it.
Afterwards, we went to the mall. She needed to buy black pants for work, and I needed to do something else besides read South African philosophy for two hours. To be honest, I was a little nervous about going. When I go to work, I put in my ear buds and make a beeline for the store, avoiding any eye contact with the trendy storefronts lasting longer that 1/9 minute, lest I regain that longing to be hip, fashionable, and soul less again. It had been awhile since I went to the mall to actually be a patron. Malls became hubs for employment, and now that I was a part of its inner-workings, I couldn't risk becoming a customer again. I couldn't afford to be a customer again.
With the hours and wage C&B was giving me, I had $24.32 at the end of each month, after the rent, insurance, and phone bill was due. Certainly not enough to buy the new $69.79 Editor pant being sold at Express. But as Cass went in to try things on, and I wandered around the store, casually browsing the rows and rows of various styles of boot cut jeans I have never understood, I suddenly felt a peace wash over me.
It's good to have less in this moment, so you may be more generous in the future.
I finally felt my finances become a joy, rather than a burden. God gifts us money, we don't earn it from him, or anyone else, for that matter. It's not mine to have, and it's not mine to hoard. I have what I have, and it's keeping me here, right where God put me. And I'm okay with that.
But hey, if he wants me to be rich, I'd totally be okay with that too.
Where do I see God moving?
In my heart, calming me down.
What do I hear God saying?One of my roommates, Cassy, was finally home for a solid eighteen hours. It was glorious. We watched three hysterically cheesy classic horror films on TCM, then went to bed, nervous Hugo the Dummy was going to kill us in our sleep. The next morning, I had someone to talk to over breakfast! Amazing! I love this revolutionary invention, this..."conversation," I think they call it.
Afterwards, we went to the mall. She needed to buy black pants for work, and I needed to do something else besides read South African philosophy for two hours. To be honest, I was a little nervous about going. When I go to work, I put in my ear buds and make a beeline for the store, avoiding any eye contact with the trendy storefronts lasting longer that 1/9 minute, lest I regain that longing to be hip, fashionable, and soul less again. It had been awhile since I went to the mall to actually be a patron. Malls became hubs for employment, and now that I was a part of its inner-workings, I couldn't risk becoming a customer again. I couldn't afford to be a customer again.
With the hours and wage C&B was giving me, I had $24.32 at the end of each month, after the rent, insurance, and phone bill was due. Certainly not enough to buy the new $69.79 Editor pant being sold at Express. But as Cass went in to try things on, and I wandered around the store, casually browsing the rows and rows of various styles of boot cut jeans I have never understood, I suddenly felt a peace wash over me.
It's good to have less in this moment, so you may be more generous in the future.
I finally felt my finances become a joy, rather than a burden. God gifts us money, we don't earn it from him, or anyone else, for that matter. It's not mine to have, and it's not mine to hoard. I have what I have, and it's keeping me here, right where God put me. And I'm okay with that.
But hey, if he wants me to be rich, I'd totally be okay with that too.
Where do I see God moving?
In my heart, calming me down.
"By jove, I think she's got it!"
How do I see God work?
Teaching me and building my self-control.
